Complicated
by elljayx
Summary: Angel has been best friends with Spike Summers for years, but when his feelings for Buffy begin to get complicated, will he ignore them for his friend's sake?
1. Girl problems

Angel walked into the Summers' house without knocking, like he had done for the past ten years. He called for Spike, but didn't get an answer. He walked through the house, thinking that perhaps Joyce would be in. Seeing that the back door was open he stepped outside and saw Buffy sitting down on the patio, her knees drawn up to her chest and a baseball cap on her head.

Angel had been best friends with Spike since he moved to Sunnydale, eleven years ago. He was only ten, he'd just lost his mother and his father was a drunken mess. His sister Kathy was Spike's cousin, Buffy's age. Joyce had become a surrogate mother to the Farren children, having them to stay over practically every night and taking care of them when their father didn't. Eventually she'd gotten in touch with their uncle Rupert Giles, their last living relative, in England and explained the situation. He'd flown over to take custody of his late sister's children, settling in Sunnydale with them.

Joyce's sister had married an English man and had William, now known as Spike. When the two were killed, she and her husband took Spike in. Buffy was five at the time, Spike was nine. Despite living in Sunnydale for practically his whole life, Spike never lost his British accent.

Buffy didn't turn around or show any sign of hearing Angel so he tapped her on the top of her hat, "Hey kiddo."

She replied with a barely audible "Hey", and Angel could hear that her voice was husky with tears. He settled down next to her and gently took her cap off, letting him see her red, puffy face. He was silent for a few moments, waiting for her to speak.

"I'm fine Angel."

He placed a hand on her knee comfortingly, "You don't cry if you're fine." She repeated her previous words but he shook her head, not believing her for a second, "What's going on?"

A few more tears slid down her face and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest and sifting his fingers through her hair. It made him ache to see her so sad. She was like a second sister to him, she always had been. She pulled away after a little while.

"It's nothing…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to have an emotional breakdown on you."

"It's obviously something Buffy."

She looked into his deep brown eyes, then spoke in a whisper, "It's embarrassing." Angel's mind went into overdrive. Embarrassing? Girl problems? That really wasn't his area of expertise, but she clearly needed someone to talk to, he couldn't leave her in the state she was in.

"What do you mean?" She didn't answer and he lifted her chin to meet her eyes. "I can't help you if you don't tell me what it is."

"You'll probably hear about it from Kathy anyway."

"I'd rather hear about it from you." She sighed in resignation and wiped her eyes one last time before taking a shaky breath. She had to be sure she wasn't going to start wailing again.

"Parker"

"Abrams? Your boyfriend?"

Buffy looked down and let out a small snort. "Make that ex-boyfriend…well, you know he's a freshman in college and…well we'd only been going out for a few weeks but he…he said he really liked me and, and I thought if I didn't…he'd go find someone else…"

Angel's heart dropped as he realised what she was trying to say, and a sick feeling began to grow in his stomach.

"Anyway we…we…two nights ago. I told mom I was sleeping over at Willow's and I stayed with him, on campus. We…slept together and everything seemed fine yesterday when I woke up. He said he'd call me, but he never did. I figured something had happened…I was gonna go to see him after school. But when I got there today, I heard some guys talking…about me and Parker…"

She took a deep breath and looked down, not wanting to see Angel's face.

"One of them said Parker told him I'd fi-finally given it up…I didn't want to believe…I didn't think…I left school at lunch and took a bus to the campus. I went up to his room a-and he wouldn't let me in…then I heard her voice…"

She covered her face with her hands and bent over, sobbing loudly. Angel's fists tightened in anger, but he reached for her and cradled her against him, his eyes dark with rage. Hurting Buffy was like hurting his sister. And Parker would pay for that. "Ssh, it's okay. It's gonna be okay."

She stayed in his arms for a few more minutes, then pulled away and wiped her eyes. "Why did he do that? Was it me…was I…"

"Buffy, Parker Abrams is a womaniser. You did nothing wrong, none of this was your fault."

"I was so stupid. Everyone told me to stay away from him, Kathy, Willow, you, Spike, Xander. And I thought I knew best. It's just…he was my…first and I wanted it to be special and then he…"

Suddenly there was a sound from in the house. Spike. Buffy quickly grabbed her baseball cap from the floor and shoved it back on her head, wiping the last remnants of tears from her face.

"Angel, I went round yours looking for you. What are you doing here?"

"Came to see you of course. Buffy was keeping me company."

Spike frowned slightly and looked at Buffy, who kept her face down to the ground. "Why aren't you in school?"

"Erm health-ed was cancelled." He seemed to accept the explanation, much to Buffy's relief. Angel and Spike had finished college that year in the summer and now had to get jobs. Angel majored in Art, due to his great talent, and was starting work at Joyce's art gallery the next week, she was even selling off some of his drawings and paintings there. Spike had majored in Engineering and wanted to open his own garage, but hadn't got the money or the place yet.

The two left, after Angel squeezed Buffy's shoulder. She had no doubt Spike would find out what had happened between her and Parker, but she wasn't ready to tell him, not yet


	2. The last thing you do

_Psycho Slayer ttm: the girl Parker was cheating on Buffy with was just a stranger, no one she knew and thanks for your comments :-) Thank you to every one else who reviewed too_

_Disclaimer: Some of the dialogue in this chapter is from the show, and i don't own them, i'm just borrowing them for the purpose of this story_

An hour after Angel and Spike left, Willow and Kathy came to the house, looking her over worriedly. She led them up into her bedroom and explained everything that had happened.

"I thought he was for real. All the things he said to me…they were so sweet."

Willow looked at her sternly: "No, they weren't. He was saying that so you'd take a chance and sleep with him. He's a poop head."

"You're right. He's manipulative and shallow. And why doesn't he want me?" Buffy's face screwed up in pain. "Am I repulsive? If there was something repulsive about me you would tell me, right?"

Kathy spoke up now, "I'm your friend. I would call you repulsive in a second."

"Maybe Parker and I could still work it out. Do you think we could still work it out?"

Willow took her hand and squeezed it gently, seeing the pain her friend was going through, before speaking, "I think you're missing something about this whole poop head principal."

"God how can I have been so stupid? I swore I'd never be pushed into it and then a few weeks into a relationship I…everyone told me about him and I wouldn't listen. I guess I thought I could change him. Maybe it wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't my first time, but…"

She began to cry and Kathy and Willow put their arms around her, rocking her soothingly and cursing the man that had done this to their friend.

The next day Angel walked on to the UC Sunnydale campus, scouring it for Parker. He couldn't see him. Buffy had never told him where he lived so he couldn't go to his dorm. He located a young blonde female who looked to be a freshman and stopped her, his charming grin in place. He flirted with her for a while before asking after Parker, saying he was meant to meet him but was running early. The girl pointed him in the direction of the Psychology room, saying he always had a lecture at this time on a Tuesday morning. No doubt another girl Parker had manipulated.

As he walked down the corridor he saw Parker walk out of the Psych room with a few of his friends. He paused when a guy stopped Parker and asked him what the scoop was on 'the high school hottie'. Angel had no doubt who he was talking about and his blood boiled as he heard Parker's response.

"Buffy? Yeah, she's alright, I guess. I mean, kind of whiney."

"How's that?"

"Well, you know, clingy. We saw each other for like four weeks then we got a little physical _laughs _uh, well, fully physical. Then she got all clingy and all over me."

Angel inched closer to the group, careful to stay out of Parker's eye line. Everyone knew how close the Summers' and the Farren's were.

"No, but fun was had, yeah?"

"Oh, yeah. The word is stamina. I mean, definitely a bunny in the sack, but later on, well. You know the difference between a high school girl and a toilet seat? A toilet seat doesn't follow you around after you use it."

That was it. Angel pushed the other guys out of the way and punched Parker hard in the nose. He crumpled to the floor, holding his nose and howling in pain. Angel bent down over him, grabbing him by the shirt and hauling him up a few inches off the floor.

"I ever hear you say anything like that again about her, this'll be the least I'll do to you. You don't deserve her. You never deserved her."

He released him and stood up, his eyes blazing as he took in the group still standing, staring. He glared at them, the message in his eyes clear _'go anywhere near Buffy and it'll be the last thing you do' _and stalked off, leaving Parker still lying on the floor.


	3. How about no?

Two days later, Buffy had a hard day at school. Guys were coming up to her practically every minute, telling crude jokes or offering to help her out now she wasn't with Parker. But Xander, Willow, Kathy, Faith (a part timer who was a friend of the group) and most of the other girls surprisingly, were supportive. She learnt she wasn't the first high school girl to be used by Parker. And she doubted she'd be the last.

But when she got home, the day got a lot worse. Spike knew.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me that prick had touched you?! I had to hear about it from Devon! I'm gonna kill him the son of a bitch!"

"Spike, please, don't do anything."

"Don't you anything?! How the bloody hell can you say that?! He touched you! Then he broke up with you. I told you not to go out with him, but you never listen to me, I told you -"

Buffy cut him off, shouting, "YES! I know you told me Spike! I know everyone told me! I know I was stupid, and naïve, and dumb, I know all that! But it's done, and I can't change it, so lay off!!"

She stormed upstairs and lay on her bed, crying. She looked over at the bedside table and saw a photo of her and Parker. She felt fresh tears rush her eyes, then blinked them away as her face hardened. She wasn't the one who should be sorry, he should. He hurt her more than anyone ever had, but he didn't deserve her tears. She took the picture out the frame, ripped it up, and threw it in the bin.

She was sitting on a bench at school when Parker pulled up in a car, got out and walked up to her. The others stood up, ready to pounce, but she held up a hand to stop them, and stood up in front of him.

"What do you want Parker?" She noticed, with more than a little satisfaction, that his nose was swollen and bruised. She wondered who was responsible for that.

"Buffy, I, I dunno how to say this. I'm sorry for how I treated you before. It was wrong of me and I'm sorry. I might not deserve this but do you think that you could forgive me?"

She looked at him in disbelief for a second then drew back her hand and slapped him as hard as she could on his cheek. He yelped in pain, before turning wide eyes on her. He opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off.

"You dated me for a month and when you finally got in my pants, you broke it off with me. You were probably cheating on me for the entire time. You brag about it to everyone you know; and then you expect me to forgive you?"

She shook her head, looked down at the floor, then drew back her fist and punched him in his already broken nose before he had time to react. He cried out and clutched at his nose, blood already free-falling from it.

"How about no?"

He quickly retreated back to his car and drove off. Buffy turned to her friends and they rushed at her, hugging her tightly and congratulating her. For the first time in almost a week, she felt happy.

When she got home, she found Spike in the living room and confronted him about Parker's injuries.

"I thought I told you not to do anything to Parker. I saw him earlier, he had a broken nose."

"I don't know who did that, but it wasn't me. Wish it had've been though. I went to the campus to have a little chat with him earlier but I heard he wasn't there. There was a rumour going round that you'd beat him up. So I decided to leave it. Guess the rumour was wrong."

"No it was right. But someone beat me to it too."

A realisation struck her and she told Spike she'd be back soon before making her way to Angel's house. He opened the door and let her in, and she immediately noticed the bruised on the knuckles on one hand. She was right.

"So I was right. It was you." She gestured to his hand and he met her eyes, unwaveringly.

"He had no right to do that to you. I was letting him know." She gave him a small smile and stepped closer to him, taking his hand in both of hers and inspecting the bruising.

"You shouldn't have done that. But thank you."

"I heard someone else gave him a beating too." She looked down sheepishly before giving him an impish grin and nodding. "Good."

She was aware that she was still holding his injured hand and dropped it quickly, coughing slightly. He placed his hands on her shoulders and pulled her to him, holding her tightly. "I'm glad you're alright."

She pulled away and looked up at him, her eyes turning serious. He was staring down at her with such intensity that she found it hard to keep eye contact, but impossible to turn away, all at the same time. She was aware that his hands were still resting lightly on her shoulders and the heat from them seemed to warm her whole body. His hands moved down her arms, rubbing lightly before letting go. He stepped away, running a hand through his thick hair before looking back at her.

He opened his mouth to speak when Giles walked in carrying his briefcase and a big pile of books. Both Angel and Buffy ran to help him, taking the books off him. Buffy set them down on the coffee table, quickly made her excuses and left, wanting to get out of there as quickly as possible.

She didn't know what had come over her. Angel was like a brother to her, he had been for the past eleven years. When he'd moved to Sunnydale when she was six, she idolised him, and she still did. He was the strong guy who'd always been there for her. She'd grown up around him and Spike, the two protectors who'd do anything for her. Angel had proved that when he'd hit Parker. And sure she'd always noticed he was attractive, she wasn't blind. And there was that time when she was twelve that she had the biggest crush on him. But now…surely not? She was just hurting, right?

Angel didn't know what to think. He'd always looked out for Buffy. She was his best friend's cousin, and Spike asked Angel years ago to look after Buffy if he wasn't around. He'd stuck to his word. And he knew Buffy was pretty. More than pretty, she was beautiful. But he didn't see her like that. She was four years younger than him, too young, and he'd never let himself see her as anything else other than a sister. He was just feeling protective, right?


	4. Jealousy

The following week, Angel had started work at Joyce's gallery. New stock had arrived and so Buffy went by after school to help with the inventory, as she usually did when new things arrived. She was still slightly shaky around Angel after what had happened. They acted as though nothing had happened but Buffy couldn't help but remember, and now every time she saw him, she felt a strange stirring in her stomach, one she'd never felt before when she'd looked at him. It was ridiculous really. She didn't like Angel in that way. He was a good friend to her, that was all. She was just blowing things out of proportion, she was imagining things that never happened, and feelings she never had.

Still, she was apprehensive when her mother sent her into the back room to work with Angel. Every brush of him against her made her tense up, and every smile was forced. Angel couldn't help but notice. He'd always noticed; so he laid a hand on her arm, stopping her work. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" She gave him yet another fake, bright smile and turned back to the boxes but he gently turned her towards him, again stopping her.

"Your eyes aren't smiling Buffy, what's up? Is it Parker?"

She looked startled and shook her head, a wry smile turning up the corners of her mouth. "No, not Parker. Believe me, he's so of the past."

"Then what?" Looking into his eyes, she could see genuine concern. She hated it when he looked at her like that. She stepped a little closer and splayed a hand on his chest, trying to show him that she was okay. He dipped his head to look at her more closely and she tilted her head up towards him.

It seemed to her that he was moving closer to her, but she couldn't quite be sure whether it was she who was getting closer to him. She felt her breath catch as she looked up into his eyes when he quickly put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her away, wringing his hands together nervously.

"Buffy…what's happening here? You and me it's…it's…"

"Wrong? Weird? Yeah I know. Maybe it's not anything. You know, I'm still feeling hurt, you're just like being the protective big brother guy."

"Yeah, yeah, that's it. That's it." He nodded emphatically, to prove his point; then they were silent, both pondering what they had just said. Angel shook his head, picked up a box and took it out of the room, leaving Buffy alone, wondering why her words felt so hollow when she'd said them.

A few days later Angel moved into his new apartment. Spike, Giles and Kathy were helping him move in, but Buffy offered to help her mother at the gallery in Angel's absence. She still wasn't sure how she felt around him, and she needed some time to work that out.

Angel was in the back room at the gallery when he heard a feminine giggle. He peeked out to see Buffy leaning against a table talking to Riley Finn, a freshman at UC Sunnydale. His teeth clenched together when he saw the way Finn lent in towards her, saw the way she responded and how her eyes lit up when she smiled.

But he wasn't going to do anything until he heard what they were talking about. "I had to tell him to."

Buffy smiled softly at Riley. "You didn't. I didn't want his apology, I knew he didn't really mean it. But still, it was sweet of you to stand up for me." Angel's anger simmered inside of him. So that was why Parker had apologised to her, Riley had told him to. And sweet! Sweet! All he got was a thank you! His eyes flashed and he stalked into the room, glad Joyce was out for lunch and couldn't see his show of masculinity.

He stood next to Buffy, folded his arms across his chest and glared openly at Riley, who balked slightly under the strength of his stare. "Buffy, I know you don't have to be here, but if you're gonna be maybe you could, oh I don't know, work."

With that he stomped back into the back room, trying to control his sudden rush of testosterone, and trying not to think about what it meant. He heard Finn leave, and two seconds later Buffy stormed into the room, her face set with anger.

"What the hell was that about! I was just being friendly."

"You were all over him, Buffy! This is a gallery, not a dating centre." Her mouth opened in shock and anger as she stepped closer.

"What's this really about, Angel? An hour ago I was sitting in here painting my nails, doing no work whatsoever, then Riley walks in and you practically combust!"

He began to speak, then stopped. She was right, he was being unreasonable. So what if she was talking (FLIRTING!) with Finn, why should he care? She'd had plenty of boyfriends before, heck he didn't even act this way when she was with Parker. And so what if Riley had stood up for Buffy to Parker, he'd be a hypocrite if he said he didn't like that. He looked down and then met her eyes again, happy to see that some of the anger had dissipated.

"I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to over-react." He was right in front of her now and she had to crane her head to look up at him.

"So why did you?" His eyes were smouldering as they looked into her own. His eyes flickered down to her lips as he bent down, bringing himself even closer to her. She focused on his lips for a few moments, then closed her eyes as she felt them meet hers.


	5. All for her

_His eyes were smouldering as they looked into her own. His eyes flickered down to her lips as he bent down, bringing himself even closer to her. She focused on his lips for a few moments, then closed her eyes as she felt them meet hers._

Angel pulled away a few millimetres before kissing Buffy again more forcefully, his hands coming to rest at her waist. She brought her own arms up around his neck as she held him at her lips, sighing contentedly as his tongue gently slid into her mouth. She met it with hers, probing tentatively and curling it around his. She almost moaned with delight when his arms tightened around her, pressing her closer to him and massaging her lower back with his fingertips. She threaded her fingers through his hair tighter, then they heard the bell ring at the front door as Joyce came back from her lunch.

The pair sprung apart, licking their lips nervously and Buffy rushed out of the room, greeting her mother before leaving the gallery. Just before she left she shot one last look at Angel, who was standing with her mother. He gave her a small smile, lifting her heart, and she practically skipped out.

The next day she told her mother she was going round to Willow's house after dinner, but went to Angel's apartment instead. He looked mildly surprised when she turned up, but let her in. When he turned around after shutting the door she was right behind him, her hands already on his arms and her face angled up for a kiss. She looked so tempting that Angel had to fight to pull her hands away and walk over to the sofa.

Buffy looked confused. Had she done something wrong? "What's wrong?" She sat down next to him, wanting to place a hand on his arm, but not sure if he'd pull away.

Angel took a deep breath. "Buffy, we can't do this."

Her brow furrowed. "Why not?" He sighed. She didn't get it. It was different for her. "Look, you're seventeen, I'm twenty-one –"

She cut him off. "I've done the math."

He shook his head. "But have you seriously thought about it? I'm four years older than you. Spike's my best friend and he's practically your brother, he'd kill me."

She shook her head. "He wouldn't. And if this is all about Spike, let me deal with him."

"You don't get it Buffy. Spike's trusted me with you. Any time he wasn't there, he'd ask me to look after you. It's like I'm betraying him." She opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off. "And your mom, she's been like a mom to me too. Do you know how much they'd hate me if they knew I was seeing you? You're in high school."

She looked angry, but inched closer to him. This wasn't going to be solved by arguing. "I might be in high school, but I'm hardly innocent, am I?"

Angel raised his eyes to hers. "That's the thing. You are. You're too innocent and good and pure for me. You don't know everything about me, Buffy. You only know what I've told you. I've done things…"

She took his hand. "So tell me." He shook his head and stood up, pacing. She got up and took his arms, standing in front of him. "Do you want to be with me?"

He wouldn't meet her gaze but she placed her hand on his chin, forcing him to and repeating the question. He sighed and leaned in closer. "More than anything."

She smiled up at him. "So isn't that all we need to know?"

She raised herself up on her tip-toes and pressed her lips to his. He tried to stop himself, but having her pressed up against him, having her warm lips moving over his, was too much and he crushed her to him, holding her tightly. She gently slid her tongue over his lips and into his mouth, meeting his. He tightened his grip further, causing a muffled moan to emit from her mouth, swallowed by his. She slipped her arms up around his neck, holding him closer and playing with the short hairs at the nape, when suddenly he moved his hands to her shoulders and pushed her away.

She stood, her chest heaving and she took deep breaths, her arms slightly open, and all Angel wanted to do was pull her back to him and kiss her again. But he didn't. "No, Buffy." Her eyes filled with frustrated tears and she stormed past him to the door, leaving the apartment.

She couldn't go home, not while she was crying. She couldn't go to Kathy's because one, Giles was there, and two, Kathy was Angel's brother. She definitely couldn't go to Xander's, the only place left was Willow's. She let her in immediately, leading her up to her bedroom and settling down on the bed.

"What's up?" Buffy took a deep breath before telling her what had been happening the past couple of weeks between her and Angel. Willow couldn't believe it, Buffy and Angel? They were like brother and sister. He'd always looked out for her, she'd never thought there'd be something else between them.

"Why's he being so stubborn, Will? I mean, four years isn't really that much. And I know he said there's things I don't know about him, but I know all I need to know, and I want to know the other things. I'm sure Spike would come round, and my mom loves Angel. Why would she care?"

"Maybe he thinks Spike would care because he knows things about Angel that you don't."

Buffy shook her head. "I don't care! Willow I…I care about him, a lot. When I kissed him it was…unbelievable. I've never been kissed like that before. And I'm not stupid, I know he's had a lot of girlfriends and a lot of practise but…it felt like it was all for me."

Willow placed a hand over Buffy's. "I'm sure he'll come around."


	6. All for him

Angel sat down on the sofa, staring moodily at the fire. What the hell did she expect him to do? She was only 17, he was an adult, he had to tell her no, what other choice did he have?

But God he did want to say yes to her. He wanted her more than he could say. He didn't know why he hadn't really thought of her in that way before. She was so completely gorgeous and sweet and funny that it took all he had to resist her. Just a few months ago he had only thought of her as a younger sister, but something changed. He wasn't sure when, maybe it was when he found out about what Parker had done to her, maybe it was before then, maybe somehow he'd always felt that way about her. But he knew it could never be anything.

She deserved more than him anyway. She was too perfect for someone like him. She had no idea what he was like, what he'd done. If she did, there was no way she'd want to be with him. He knew Spike would go crazy, and he had every right to. Angel had hurt him more than anyone else.

He stood up quickly, pacing around the room as he thought. He didn't belong with her, and she sure as hell didn't belong with him. She needed someone like that Finn guy, though even the thought of her with someone else made his blood boil. Lately all he could see was her with Parker. Parker touching her. Parker kissing her. Parker making love to her. It was enough to drive him crazy. And when she'd kissed him. God, it felt like nothing he'd ever felt before. It felt like she was just made for him, like everything she had, everything she was, was all for him. And that was why he knew he had to get her out of his mind, before it got too far; he just had no idea how.

_Sorry, it's a really short chapter, I know, but it just felt like the right place to stop. Hope you enjoy, and thanks everyone for your comments :-)_


	7. I missed you

_Disclaimer: Again some of the dialogue is taken from the show but I don't own it_

A week later Buffy still hadn't seen Angel. She'd been too afraid to go to the gallery, and he hadn't been round for dinner at all, usually he came round at least once if not twice a week, but this time only Kathy and Giles did. She missed him; his laugh, his smile, his company, his presence. She missed it all. Finally she'd had enough. She skipped school when she knew her mom had her dinner break and went to the gallery. Angel looked up when she entered and took a deep breath. She looked stunning. "Buffy." He'd meant it to sound welcoming, instead it sounded breathy and full of want. He took a deep breath and tried again. "Buffy, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in school?"

"I cut. I missed you." She gave him such a cute pout, that Angel had to grip on to a table to stop himself from rushing to her and kissing it away. "Oh…I…uh…"

"Why have you been avoiding me? You haven't come for dinner once this week."

He coughed, trying to stop his sudden outbreak of stutters. "Well erm, I was really busy. You know, sorting out the apartment, it's still not finished completely."

She nodded and looked down before moving closer to him. Angel took a step back and shook his head. "Buffy, if you and I date, we both know one thing's gonna lead to another."

She took another step closer. "One thing already has led to another. Don't you think it's a little late to be reading me a warning label?"

Angel looked down. She was so young, she didn't understand what it could be like. "I'm just trying to protect you. This could get outta control."

She was right in front of him now. "Isn't that the way it's supposed to be?"

He grabbed hold of her shoulders and hoisted her up to his level, causing a small gasp to leave her. "This isn't some fairytale. When I kiss you, you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after."

She shook her head. "No, when you kiss me I wanna die." She broke free of him and walked out of the gallery.

When she got back to school she was in a daze. Angel was never going to come round, she knew that now. He was just so damn stubborn. Why didn't he see it? They liked each other, a lot. They were both single. Yeah, four year age gap, so what? And so what if he's got a questionable past? She didn't care. She just wanted him.

Cordelia walked up to her when other people were piling from the class. "Buffy! Did you lose weight? And your hair…alright I respect you too much to be dishonest. The hair's a little…well that really isn't the point here is it? The Zeta Kappas have to have a certain balance at their party. And Richard explained it all to me but I was so busy really listening that I didn't hear much."

Buffy thought to the day before when she'd met Richard and Tom. She hadn't liked Richard in the slightest but Tom, he seemed nice. Cordelia carried on speaking, much to Buffy's annoyance.

"Anyway, the deal is they need you to go. And if you don't go, I can't. And I'm talking about Richard Anderson, okay? As in Anderson Farms, Anderson aeronautics, and Anderson cosmetics." She sobbed slightly at the last one. "Well you see why I have to go. Buffy, these men are rich! And I am not being shallow. Think of all the poor people I could help with all my money!"

Buffy was thinking about Angel's words and she made her decision. "I'll go."

Cordelia looked at her surprised, then beamed. "You'll go? Great. I'll drive. Oh, Buffy, it's like we're sisters. With really different hair!"

Buffy had told Willow about the party, and she was more than a little jealous that Buffy was going with Cordelia. Now, sitting in the car, Buffy wasn't sure it was such a good idea. However, she had little choice when Cordelia practically dragged her inside…

Willow had blurted out to Xander that Buffy was attending the fraternity party that night, and he'd immediately driven down there, wanting to check that Buffy was safe. He didn't trust those frat guys, not with HIS Buffy. Of course, Xander knew nothing about Angel. Willow didn't trust him to keep his mouth shut in front of Spike if he knew. Willow was sitting in the Bronze alone, thinking Xander might show up, when she heard a girl talking about the frat parties. "What they do to girls…I'd never go there…" Willow's heart dropped into her stomach and she ran over to the girl…

Angel was sitting in his apartment, preparing to drown his sorrows when there was a frantic knocking on his door. He sighed and went to open it, fully intending to tell the person where to stick it before going back to his brooding session. However, the person at the door was Willow. And she seemed very worried. He let her in and she paced slightly before launching into a speech.

"I'm worried about Buffy. I was talking to a girl earlier and she said bad things happen at frat parties, especially ones at the Delta Zeta Kappa house, and now I'm really worried, and I don't know what to do and I thought I could come to you because if I went to Spike he'd totally flip and -"

"Willow, calm down. What does a frat party have to do with Buffy?"

"Buffy's gone there tonight, with Cordelia." She waited for the explosion and winced visibly when it finally came.

"What?! Is she completely insane?! She's only 17!!"

"Well…" She was nervous now. She hated seeing Angel angry, she hated it even more when she was the cause of it.

"Did she have a date?!" Willow paused slightly and Angel gave an irritated snort. A feeling of protectiveness for her best friend came over her and she squared her shoulders.

"Well why do you think she went to that party? Because you gave her the brush-off!!" Angel gave her a surprised look. "Yeah, I know all about that! She told me! You really upset her! You've known her eleven years and you still don't know how to tactful around her? And after Parker I'm sure that helped her confidence a lot!"

She took a deep breath and Angel was quiet, battled into submission by Willow's heart felt speech.

"Okay. I don't feel better now, and we've got to help Buffy."


	8. Thank you

Buffy, Richard and Tom stood on the deck. Richard gave her a drink and she looked at it, considering it before downing it in one. She was tired of trying to be mature. She wanted to drink, so she'd drink…

Buffy stumbled against the dresser and apologised before managing to crawl up the stairs into a room. She was relieved to see a bed there and crawled on to it, lying down. "Okay. Nice bed. Just need to stop spinning…"

Willow and Angel sped to the frat house in his car, her clinging on to the seat for dear life as Angel muttered curses under his breath. How could she be so stupid? Surely she knew the dangers for teenage girls. Anything could happen. He knew what college guys could be like, they could be dangerous. They pulled up outside the frat house and noticed, worriedly, that although people were leaving the party in droves, Cordelia's car was still there.

Suddenly someone walked up behind them. They spun around to see Xander there. Angel spoke up, confused. "Hey."

"Hey, what are you guys doing here?"

Willow wrung her hands, nervously. "A girl told me about things that happen at Zeta Kappa parties, we're worried about Buffy."

Xander gestured to the car. "I think she's still inside somewhere with Cordelia. We need to get in there."

Buffy was blissfully unconscious on the bed, and Cordelia was sitting beside it, also passed out. Richard walked in and traced a finger down the front of Buffy's body. Suddenly Tom grabbed him and pushed him against the wall.

"Get away from her!"

Richard looked indignant as he glanced at the sleeping Buffy. "I wasn't doing anything!"

Tom gave him a disbelieving look. "I saw what you were doing."

Richard sighed, defeated. "I was just having a little fun." He looked over at Buffy, admiring the way her dress had ridden up slightly.

"Well she's not here for your fun. Not yet. Not until the ritual." Richard sighed and looked down, ashamed.

"The ritual. I'm sorry."

"Bring the other on to the bed, we need to prepare them." Richard did so and Tom slowly began to pull Buffy's dress up. Just as it was above her stomach, Angel, Willow and Xander burst in. Angel snarled angrily at Tom, then dragged him away from Buffy, throwing him across the room. He pulled Buffy's dress back down and cupped her cheek with one hand as Xander took care of Richard. The move woke her slightly and she looked up at him, her eyes barely open. "Angel?"

Tom got up and began to move forward. Angel took him by the throat and pressed him back into the wall. "Sick son of a bitch. Are there any others?" He didn't answer and Angel shook him. "Are there any others?!" There was a small moan as Cordelia woke up. Buffy sat up slowly, collapsing slightly into Willow's arms.

"She's down in the basement."

Angel turned to Willow and Xander. "Stay here, take care of them." He looked back at Tom. "Show me."

When Angel had left Willow got out her phone and rang for the police and an ambulance. The Zeta Kappas wouldn't get away with it. Not this time. Angel got down into the basement and saw two guys looming over a terrified girl, chained to the wall and wearing a ragged cloth dress. He guessed that Tom was their leader, so he cleared his throat getting their attention. The pair looked over at him, angry, when he lifted Tom slightly off the ground by the throat.

"Let the girl go." They hesitated and Angel squeezed harder. The guys hurriedly unchained her, pushing her in Angel's direction. He let go of Tom, who crumpled to the floor, took hold of the girl's waist and rushed upstairs with her, locking the basement as he went. She was a crying wreck and could barely stand, probably due to drugs the guys had pumped into her system. "Ssh, it's all over now."

She clutched him to her. "Thank you. I was so scared." They heard sirens and Angel told her to stay sitting downstairs while he went to fetch the others. Buffy and Cordelia were still disorientated. Xander and Willow helped her downstairs while Angel scooped Buffy into his arms and carried her, cradling her close to his body. She half-heartedly protested, but he wouldn't let her go.

When the paramedics arrived they checked over the three girls, saying they were going to be fine and could go home. The police took statements from them all, then Xander and Willow took Cordelia and the other girl, whose name was Callie, home. Angel helped Buffy into his car but didn't drive off straight away. "What the hell were you thinking Buffy?"

She didn't answer him, just crossed her arms and looked out of the window. "You could have been hurt, they were going to –"

She looked at him and cut him off. "Yes, I know what they were going to do! But I just wanted to act like a real girl, I wanted to go and have fun."

He glared at her angrily. "So having fun for you means getting raped?!"

"You think if I knew they were going to do that I'd go there?! I just…Tom seemed nice, okay? And unlike some people, he seemed interested in me, and like he was prepared to do something about it."

There was no mistaking her meaning and he shook his head slowly. "Don't blame this on me Buffy, I was trying to do the right thing!"

She laughed softly and looked out the window again. "Just take me home." He started the car and drove to her house. But before she could get out, he laid a hand on her knee.

"You have no idea how scared I was Buffy, when Willow said you'd gone there. There's always been stories about the Zeta Kappas, I thought…I didn't know what to think."

She placed her hand on top of his and squeezed gently. "Thank you." She removed his hand, got up and walked shakily into her house. She knew her mom would kill her when she found out what had happened, and that'd be nothing compared to what Spike would do. Why did she always pick the bad guys? Her eyes filled with tears as she realised what had almost happened. The tears kept coming until she was standing on her front step sobbing, fighting to get her keys out of her bag.

Angel ached to jump out of the car and go and take her in his arms. He could tell she was crying. His hand was on the door handle and he was on the verge on opening it when her front door opened and Joyce stood there. Buffy threw herself into her mom's arms, and Angel drove off. He wasn't needed. Not now.


	9. I love you

The next morning there was a pounding on Angel's front door. He opened it, bleary eyed, to see Spike standing there. "Spike."

He stormed in, obviously furious. "Why didn't you call me when you heard Buffy had gone to that party?"

Angel sat down on the sofa, his head in his hands. "I wasn't thinking straight. I just knew Buffy was in trouble, I didn't want to waste time ringing any one else." Spike looked slightly pacified and sat down next to him.

"If those pricks ever get out of jail, I'm gonna hunt them down myself." Angel nodded. That's how he felt too. Spike looked at him. "How did it feel hitting him?"

Angel grinned back at him. "Best ever." His face turned serious. "How's Buffy doing."

"Joyce's grounded her for a few weeks and she's pretty shaken up about it. I just can't believe she was so stupid. Said she did it to fit in." He snorted. "Guess she's done a lot of stupid things lately. The party. Parker."

A flash of anger shot through Angel at the mention of Parker's name. "Hey, that wasn't her fault. You know what Parker's like."

Spike nodded. "Yeah I knew. And I still didn't stop her did I?"

Angel shook his head. That was exactly the way he felt. He should have spoken up more when he had the chance, he should have scared Parker off. Instead he just sat back and let it happen. And now he was in an even bigger mess. Spike stood up. "Anyway, Joyce wanted to know if you're coming round for dinner tomorrow night. Kathy's coming too." Angel nodded, glad when Spike left. He knew he couldn't make excuses any more, he had to face Buffy some time, he had to get back to normal. He couldn't lie, he had feelings for her and he cared about her. A lot. But it couldn't ever be anything.

Angel sat at the dinner table, talking to Joyce about new inventory they were getting the next week when he felt a small foot inch its way up his leg. He choked slightly on his drink, causing Joyce to give him a concerned look. He assured her he was fine, then shot a glare at Buffy, sitting opposite him. She gave him an innocent look, then began a conversation with Kathy, all the while moving her foot further up his leg. When she reached the inside of his thigh he quickly excused himself, saying he needed the bathroom. He had to get out of there. She didn't know just how much she affected him.

Angel excused himself early, not bearing to be around Buffy any longer, but she offered to show him to the door. They stood on the porch together, neither saying a word, before he exploded at her. "What do you think you were doing in there?!"

She gave him a coy smile. "Playing footsie with you."

He gripped her arm tightly. "Do you have any idea what that was doing to me? We've talked about this!"

Buffy shook her arm free. "No. You've talked about this, WE haven't."

She took his head between her hands and brought him down to her when he pushed her away. "No." He stormed off down the street but she was adamant.

She followed him, turning him around. "You can't run away from me. And you can't run away from this! I know you care about me." Angel wouldn't meet her eyes. "Tell me you don't care about me, Angel. Tell me and I'll leave you alone." He didn't say anything. "You can't can you?" She hesitated then wrapped her arms around him and rested her head against his chest, happy when he enveloped her in his warmth.

"I can't pretend anymore Angel. I'm tired of pretending I don't feel anything for you."

He squeezed her tighter, then tilted her head up to meet his. "I do care about you Buffy. More than you know. I…"

Buffy gently traced the edge of his jaw with his finger-tip. "You what?"

"I love you." Her eyes widened at his words and she lifted herself up on tip-toes to meet his lips in a passionate embrace.

When they broke away she rested her forehead against his chin and whispered. "I love you." He crushed her to him, holding her.

Buffy walked back into her house, her hands shaking slightly as she joined Kathy, Spike and her mom in the living room. Kathy gave her an odd look but she ignored it, trying her best to act natural when really all she wanted to do was jump up and down, screaming with happiness. The two of them had decided not to say anything to the others, not yet. She knew Angel was still worried about Spike and Joyce's reactions, and she didn't want to ruin what they'd finally got, so she'd agreed. Besides, it'd give them more time to get to know each other.


	10. Dru

Buffy giggled as Angel swirled his tongue in her belly button playfully and she batted at his head gently as her stomach clenched. Angel propped himself up on his elbow, almost drooling as he looked down at her, lying on his bed in only a short skirt and her bra. She was gorgeous, and completely delicious. He kissed his way up her before caressing her lips with his, happily complying as she pulled him fully over her.

They'd been together for three months now, Buffy had not long turned eighteen and they still hadn't told anyone other than Willow. But two and a half months ago Kathy had walked in on the two of them in a heavy make-out session and practically shrieked the house down, so she knew too. She'd been sworn to secrecy though, so her and Willow made up for it by discussing it between the two of them. Willow was pleased Kathy knew so she could talk about it with someone else, she hated keeping secrets to herself.

When Angel finally pulled away from her mouth they were both breathless and she was limp in his arms, her fingers running up and down his back underneath his sweater. It was her favourite sweater; black and completely moulded to his frame. She thought he looked sinful in it, and he knew. He bent his head again, kissing her breathless again. He was so glad he hadn't logic-ed himself out of it; he didn't know how he'd survived without her for so long.

A few days later, Angel and Kathy were sitting with Spike and Buffy in the Summers' house. Kathy found it amusing how Spike was the only one who didn't know what was going on and was prone to fits of giggles. Spike seemed to remember something and turned to Angel. "By the way, Darla's coming back to town next month. I think she'll come looking for you." Buffy's stomach jolted in recognition. The image of a blonde girl came to mind as she frowned, searching her brain. Try as she might, nothing else came up other than that image. She noticed the way Angel's body language changed rapidly when Spike mentioned Darla's name and made a mental note to ask him about her.

The next day, when the two of them were sitting on his sofa, Buffy decided to take a risk. "Who's Darla?" Beside her, she felt Angel tense. "I can remember she was blonde, but that's about it."

Angel's voice was tight when he spoke. "She was a mistake."

"Wanna tell me a little more?"

Angel wanted nothing more than anything to say 'no', but he didn't. He knew he was going to have to tell her about this sooner or later. "Darla and I started going out when I was 17. We were together for a year a half before I found out she'd been cheating on me. I'd just started college and I found her in bed with one of my supposed best friends. It hurt me. A lot. I started doing things…not good things…Staying out all night drinking and waking up next to girls I'd never seen before. Even Spike couldn't stop me."

He moved his arm from round Buffy, giving her time to leave if she wanted to. "I hurt a lot of people then, mainly girls. The worst thing that happened was Drusilla."

Buffy frowned. "Drusilla? Spike's ex-girlfriend?" She remembered the two of them had gone out for a couple of years but broken up in college.

"Yeah. One night Spike told me he and Dru had split up. He'd found her cheating, like I'd found Darla. Anyway, that night she came to me and I…I didn't tell her to leave. A couple of days later Dru and Spike got back together, he really loved her he told me. Somehow he found out about the two of us and he went crazy. Dru left to go back to England and he always blamed me. It took him months to talk to me."

Now that she thought about it, Buffy could remember a time when she was fourteen and Angel stopped coming round for a while. She'd figured it was because it was busy at college. He turned to her. "The reason I was worried about us two was because he's never going to forgive me when he finds out I've taken another girl away from him. But I love you too much to stop myself."

She pulled him to her, holding him as he rested his head on her shoulder. "He never really forgave me. We moved past it, but that was all. I don't know what he'll do when he finds out about us." Buffy didn't say anything, just held him against her.


	11. Perfect

Three weeks later, a few days after Angel's twenty-second birthday, Buffy pulled Angel on top of her on his bed. He broke off the kiss, sensing where this was going. "Buffy –"

She cut him off. "I want to Angel, I'm just afraid that…that you won't want to be with me after. I mean, what if I'm not good?"

Angel rolled them on to their sides and kissed her tenderly. "Buffy, I love you. And not be good? That's impossible." She opened her mouth again to argue but he kissed her.

When they broke off she pulled his top up over his head and moved her hands to his waistband. He stopped her and kissed her fingers. "Buffy, if you're not –"

She shook her head. "I am. I love you, I want to be with you." He relented and nodded, rolling her on to her back and letting his lips move to her neck.

"Let's just take this slow, okay?"

When Buffy woke up a few of hours later she kept her eyes closed, a smile on her face. It had still hurt, like before, but only for a few seconds. After that, definitely of the good. Both times. She opened her eyes and was relieved to find Angel propped up on an elbow, smiling down at her. He gently kissed her nose and she looked at him, worried. "Was it…I mean was I…?"

He rubbed her nose with his. "You were perfect. Buffy any time I spend with you is completely amazing, whether we're watching a movie, talking or making love…multiple times." She blushed, embarrassed at his last words.

The door bell rang and he placed a last kiss on her lips before pulling on some sweats and a sweater and moving to answer the door. From the bedroom, Buffy could hear a soft, sultry voice and she realised she was wrong. That was another thing she could remember about Darla. Her fists tightened angrily when she had an idea. Probably a very stupid idea, but she didn't care. Slipping out of bed, she grabbed one of Angel's shirts, shrugged it on and padded out into the hallway.

She spotted 'the cow' and glared angrily before coming into Angel and Darla's line of sight. His mouth practically dropped open when he saw her standing there, possibly looking sexier than she ever had done before, in one of his shirts, and Darla's reaction was pretty much the same. "Buffy Summers. Well Angel, I didn't know you were seeing high school girls now."

Buffy walked up behind Angel, wrapping her arms around his waist and standing on her tip-toes to kiss the nape of his neck. "Not high school girls. Just me."

Darla rolled her eyes and swiftly left. Angel turned around, his eyes worried. "Why did you do that? She knows Spike, Buffy. She's probably on her way there now."

Buffy on the other hand didn't look in the least bit worried. "I was marking my territory. And don't worry about it." She began to press wet, hot kisses on his neck and he felt his resolve waver. Eventually, after much stuttering, he groaned, picked her up and carried her to the bedroom.

The lovers were lying in bed an hour later, pressed tightly together, sharing kisses and talking about the future when Spike burst into the bedroom. Buffy gasped and pulled the sheets higher up her body while Angel slid out of bed and pulled his sweats back on. Spike had him up against the wall just seconds later while Buffy crawled across the bed, shouting at him to stop. He just ignored her.

"How long have you been doing her for? Eh? Answer me!! How could you? Taking advantage of her?! She's like my baby sister Angel, hell she's like your baby sister! She's four years younger than you!"

Buffy stood up, the sheet wrapped tightly around her. "And SHE is standing right here." She prised Spike off Angel and stood in between them, her eyes narrowed at him.

"What did he tell you Buffy? That you were beautiful? That you were his world? What did he say to get you in to bed?!" Angel placed his hands on Buffy's shoulders now, his eyes blazing.

"Don't speak to her like that! You have no idea what this is about."

Spike returned his glare. "Enlighten me."

Angel moved his hands down to her waist and looked seriously at Spike. "I love her. I'm in love with her, damnit. I have been for months. We tried to stop but we can't."

Spike snorted. "First Parker and now you. You know what she's been through but you still did it? Buffy, you don't know what he's really like. He –"

"Slept with your girlfriend the day you broke up with her? Yeah I know. I know all about it. He told me everything. And I've moved past it. I love him too Spike, and you can't stop us from being together. And if you must know, he didn't push me into anything. Besides, it's none of your business."

Spike exploded. "Like hell it's not! He promised to take care of you!"

"And he does. He always has done. Does it matter if he does that as my friend or my boyfriend? I know about his past, I know about Darla and Drusilla and all the other girls. I also know he's never been anything more than loving and caring to me. He never used me or forced me into anything. He loves me and I love him. I won't let you ruin that Spike. You need to move past what happened with Drusilla and be happy for us. Besides, I know you and Faith have been together for longer than we have so don't you dare play the age card."

Spike started spluttering loudly. "Oh please. You may be able to keep a secret but Faith definitely can't. Surely you knew that when you started dating her? I know you've been at it like rabbits too, even if it wasn't for Faith's juicy little stories. Your room is right next door to mine, you think I can really sleep through all that? You are so lucky Mom sleeps like the dead." Spike went bright red, a great contrast to his white hair and looked between Buffy and Angel before storming out of the apartment.

Angel couldn't help but grin down at her despite the seriousness of the situation. "Spike and Faith? How come you never told me?"

She looked slightly embarrassed, then grinned. "Because I wasn't sure it was true. I was right, Faith can't keep other people's secrets, but she's damn good at keeping her own. She won't tell us anything about her past. But they've both been happier lately, and they've been sharing those secretive looks since before we got together. And I have heard Spike and someone in his bedroom at night. It was just guess work that made me say Faith." Angel wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead.

She relaxed against him, squeezing him tighter. "It's gonna be alright. He'll come round. He left because he knew he couldn't say anything else. And I know mom's gonna be fine about it. She loves you." She pulled away and began to get dressed, then pressed a long, hard kiss to his lips. "I love you. I'd better go and find Spike."

"Will you be alright talking to him on your own?"

She just snorted. "He's a big softie really." She wrapped her arms around his neck again and kissed him. "Today was perfect, thank you."

He grinned down at her. "Even with Darla and Spike?"

She smiled up at him. "Even with the slut and Spike." He pressed his lips to hers, then let her go, unable to stop a small smile from rising to his lips. He found himself believing Buffy and not worrying about Spike. They could deal with him. They were in love and he'd just spent practically the whole day making love to her. She was right, it was perfect.


	12. Chill

Angel stood on the Summers' doorstep for at least five minutes before ringing the bell. It felt so strange; he hadn't rung the bell for over ten years, and he'd certainly never been as nervous about going to their house for dinner. But this time it was different. This time he was going as Buffy's boyfriend, and he knew this time he wasn't going to spend time with Spike and Joyce, he was going to convince them he was worthy of Buffy. He sure as hell wasn't looking forward to it.

Finally he plucked up the courage to ring the bell and Buffy opened the door, greeting him with a large grin and a soft kiss. He pulled away quickly, checking to see if Spike and Joyce had seen. Buffy's grin just widened at seeing how nervous he was and she lent into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Chill, it's fine."

He smiled down at her, but carefully removed her arms. He didn't want to make a bad impression before dinner had even started. Buffy led him into the lounge and Angel's heart dropped at he saw Spike sitting there, his eyes set in a glare. Angel fidgeted nervously under his stern look, but Buffy cleared her throat, staring meaningfully at Spike. He took the hint and stood up, walking over to them.

"I'm not gonna pretend I'm alright with this. But I made a promise to Buffy, and I'm gonna try to. Besides, I…well we've been mates for a long time."

Angel smiled at him, knowing it had taken Spike a lot to say that to him. "Thanks."

"Yeah, well. If you hurt her, best mate or not, I'll still kill you."

Joyce was gracious as ever, but for the first fifteen minutes the conversation was stilted and Angel felt more than a little awkward; it was only Buffy's remarkable good mood and joking humour that kept them all talking at times. Eventually though, Angel began to relax. They were after all still the same family; Joyce was the same woman who'd practically brought him up, Spike was still the same guy as always; the only thing that had changed was his relationship with Buffy. And, looking over at her, he realised he wouldn't change that for the world.

After dinner Angel politely said he had to leave and Joyce warmly said he was still welcome over any time he wanted to, and gave a sly wink to Buffy, even Spike managed a smile. Buffy followed him outside and wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him a long, toe-curling kiss.

"Mmm, I've been waiting to do that all night." He smiled down at her and gently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before kissing her again.

He took a deep breath and rubbed his nose with hers. "So, how did I do?"

She gave him a grin and smoothed her hands down his chest. "You did great. Just like I said. I told you, Mom still loves you and Spike'll be fine by next week. You two have been best friends for so long, you know he won't stay angry at you for long."

_Sorry it took me so long to update, had a bit of a mental block! And i apologise for the length of this chapter, i just wanted to get this part out of the way quickly. Hope you like!_


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